The substance on my sandwich was squirted out of a lactating cow, exposed to a variety of bacteria, then left to curdle. It was then squished, coated with wax, and left to sit for a while. Then, it was placed into a smoky room until it was coated with the substances in the smoke. Then it was sliced. It was then placed between two pieces of a substance made from ground berries grown in soil enriched with cow poop and mixed with a single-celled organism that ate part of the ground stuff and farted all through the mixture. Then, the entire concoction was placed into a pan containing a teaspoon of fat skimmed from the same lactated material and then whipped.
No, you can’t have any of my grilled gouda sandwich.
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